she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
You know, be my cock's hype man.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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