There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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