Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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