Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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