Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I would fuck him just for his dog
Randomize
