That's intense
Non-Jews are for practice
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Randomize
