Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Randomize