My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
