Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
