I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
