Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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