Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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