It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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