either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize
