we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize