my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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