He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
