yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
