She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
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