3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize
