in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
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