Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
