if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
