): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
