I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Randomize
