what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
