last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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