I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I'm gonna fight the coyote
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
