im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
