New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Small penises have feelings too.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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