I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
