So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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