She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
