the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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