Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
My friends, they love my intelligence
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
