this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
