Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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