Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
