Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
