i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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