is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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