The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
