Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
i think im in europe. pls send help
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
