talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
