I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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