idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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