i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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