I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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