"it" just moved
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
