Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
