Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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