You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Randomize
